Why do I have to wander around town to the point where I'm starving?
Stupid Kagura...
How can you let a growing girl go three days on less than four pints of rice?!
Why don't we have any work?
We wouldn't have to go hungry if you worked every day!
Go find work right now!
I won't let you inside the house until you've found a job!
Easy for you to say.
We're in a global recession, you know.
It's not my fault that I can't find any work.
And she eats way too much.
Hey, Gin-san!
It's you.
Man, that's pretty impressive.
Like you can pull it off when you put your mind to it?
Huh?
To be honest, I'm in a tight situation right now.
So how about it?
Give me a little assistance or charity?
Huh?
Stop trying to dodge the question!
You don't have to act like you're all that
because you're raking it in, Gin-san!
Huh?!
What are you even talking about?
When did I start raking it in?!
Don't play dumb!
I was at Hello Work when I heard the crazy rumors!
[Note: Hello Work is a Japanese unemployment office.]
Odd Jobs is red-hot!
They're talking about how you're fast, cheap, and nice!
And cool to boot!
What?!
What's this?
Odd Jobs...Kingon?
[Note: Parody of Odd Jobs Gin. Gin (silver) was changed to Kin (gold).]
["That Matsutake Soup Stuff Tastes Better Than The Real Deal"]
[Note: Matsutake is a popular and expensive mushroom in Japan. The soup is a cheap dried powder version.]
Who are these people?!
What's with their similar name?!
What is this?!
They're interfering with our business!
It's their fault that I've eaten less than four pints of rice over the past week!
Still...
They're more popular,
so we can't really do anything about it.
Is it okay for the original to lose to the copycat?!
At this rate, they'll be considered the real ones!
We'll be buried in the annals of history!
Are you okay with that?!
Isn't that how history works?
These days, nobody cares about where something originated.
What are you talking about?!
We cannot accept such dark history!
Besides, it was Gin-chan's original idea to use this particular incarnation of Odd Jobs.
This would be a big deal if it was the Mouse Kingdom!
[Note: Mouse Kingdom refers to Disneyland and the strict Disney copyright.]
This must be it.
They look kinda cool.
They're pretending to be celebrities.
Leader, captain, support, mascot?
[Note: Equivalent to the roles Gintoki, Kagura, Shinpachi and Sadaharu fill.]
Leader.
Name and age are a secret.
Sorry.
Height: Around 180 cm.
Weight: Never ask a guy his weight.
Hobby: To become the wind.
Special talent: Abacus, third level.
I can touch my nose with tip of my tongue.
What? That's creepy.
Check the captain.
I'm the captain.
My height and weight are like a model's.
Like, duh, of course.
Hobby: Like, being all popular and loved and stuff?
Special talent: Like, duh, I have talents?
This cell phone novel-like text is pissing me off!
[Note: Cell phone novels are written in text messages by young Japanese girls. They often speak in slang.]
They even have a blog.
Let's talk about what really happens every now and then.
[Note: Parody of #138 title, "Why Not Talk About the Old Days for a Change?"]
X month, X day.
A sudden job led to a surprising encounter.
Can't reveal the name, but it was someone famous.
Once we heard the circumstances, we were determined to accept the job.
We're grateful for the opportunity to meet this person.
X month, X day.
We had to go overseas rather suddenly for that previous job.
We're grateful to the members of the staff.
X month, X day.
Problem solved.
The client gave us champagne as a thank you gift.
We're grateful for the heartwarming comments.
What's with all the self-adoration here?
Isn't this person a little confused?
Our Odd Jobs range from cleaning gutters to looking for lost kittens.
Or helping old ladies with their shopping.
It's honest work.
All behind the scenes.
This person's pretending to be a celebrity!
I can't forgive such an act!
I'm going to find these people who have no shame!
The fakes' office is up ahead.
I'm so glad we went to the Odd Jobs.
Told you so.
Nothing to worry about if we let Odd Jobs handle it.
And we even got this beautiful vase.
[Note: It's a common scam trick in Japan to sell a vase to a troubled person saying it will change their luck.]
And your fate is no longer tied my ancestors.
And I can easily pass the 4th grade STEP.
[Note: STEP=Society for Testing English Proficiency.]
And it only cost half a year's salary.
H-H-H-Half a year?!
No, that's not what you should be excited about.
People that stupid can still be in a relationship?!
No, that's not it either.
That's an expensive-looking office building.
They must be raking in the cash with their fishy business.
Shinpachi... Kagura...
We're taking them down.
We can't allow these imposters to have their way.
Time to lay the smackdown.
Let's go!
They're on the second floor!
Let's see what these fakes look like!
K-Kanemaru-kun!
[Note: Old Odd Jobs member from Ep. 138]
Ikezawa!
[Note: Old Odd Jobs member from Ep. 138]
[Translation: I'm not Furuhashi, you bastards!!]
[Note: "Leader" is Stainless Boy. A Parody of Crystal Boy from Cobra, a Shonen Jump manga from the 80s.]
Who are you?
[The End]
Gin-san. Kagura-chan.
Listen to this!
I was walking along,
when these high school girls looked at my face and laughed!
Is there something funny about my face?!
Is it strange?!
Is there something on my face?!
Don't you think it's rude to laugh?!
Gin-san?
Kagura-chan?
Man, where did they run off to?
What? They're in there, huh?
H-Hey, big guy.
Can you pull my arm?
I'm stuck.
I'm telling you to pull my arm.
Hurry it up.
Ah, yes!
Ow! Ow! Ow!
That hurts, you damn fool!
Forget it.
I'll get out by myself.
Young people these days don't even know how to pull someone out of a desk.
[Note: Parody of Doraemon. The main character of an anime and manga about a blue cat-shaped robot who came from the future to help a boy.]
Uh? How to pull someone out of a desk?
No. Most people wouldn't know how to do that.
Get me some tea, big guy.
Huh?
I'm telling you to get me some tea!
This place doesn't provide its guests with any service?
Ah, right away.
Who is that?
["People Who Die Stay Dead"]
What's that?
Some high school girls said you were gross and disgusting?
No, it wasn't that bad.
They were just laughing at me...
Though on second thought, it could have been in a good way.
Like, "Oh, He's so cute! Whee!"
Are you a moron?
A moron?
Like hell that would happen.
Keep your eyes wide open and look straight ahead.
In what universe would any high school girls laugh at you in such a romantic way?
You're deluding yourself.
Gross! Disgusting! Four-eyes!
Why do I have to be insulted for my glasses?
Uh, can I ask something?
What's up?
Who are you?
Me?
I'm a robot from the future.
A robot?!
You're going to have a sad and sorry future at this rate, so I came to help ya.
I'll ask just because I have a feeling the conversation would end if I just accepted that,
but what does this sad and sorry future entail?
A sad and sorry future would be sad and sorry.
Yeah...
You're wearing glasses, which means your eyes are bad, right?
Well, yeah...
Plus, you don't know how to be considerate and fail at sports.
Most people with those circumstances have bad luck.
No looks, no brains, no luck.
Sad and sorry enough as it is, but if it gets worse...
I can't bear to tell you.
So one of your descendants ordered me to help you out.
Which is why I'm here when I didn't really want to come.
By the way, big guy.
You're not being considerate enough.
What do you mean?
This right here!
I ask for some tea and that's all you bring?
You're supposed to offer a snack, too.
Yeah, you know what I mean?
The one with red bean sandwiched between two spongy pancake-like things?
In any case,
bring me some damn dorayaki!
[Note: Dorayaki is Doraemon's favorite food.]
Ah, he said it.
Here you are.
This is what I'm talking about!
U-Uh...
What's up?
If I have descendants...
That would mean I got married and had kids, right?
So...
Who do I marry?
Oh, knew it! Knew it! Knew it!
I knew you'd be asking me that.
I knew it was coming.
Big guy's a real...dirty...man.
Man, I can't get over how young people these days don't have any patience.
Look here.
It'd be simple for me to give you the answer.
But you know what?
That would make you give up on thinking for yourself.
You okay with that?
Aren't you just saying that because you don't know?
Looks like I'll have to explain this to you, big guy.
E-Explain what?
Under normal circumstances,
you would hesitate and wonder about whether you really liked that girl.
A man betters himself through the effort of establishing and maintaining a relationship.
You could even say that love only lasts because of constant growth.
If I give you the answer now,
you'll believe that you can marry that girl without doing anything.
And then you'll just lounge around your entire life
without putting in any effort or taking any risks, dumbass.
Which is why I won't tell you.
I'm not being mean.
Forgive me, Nekoemon-san.
[Note: Parody of Doraemon. "Neko" means "cat".]
Who are you calling Nekoemon?!
Huh?! Didn't you come from the future to help me out?
People even treat me like a Buddha or a god.
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's fear of mice.]
But I can't stand cats.
I absolutely despise them!
The sound they make gives me shivers.
Look here.
These ears were bitten by a cat.
[Note: In the story, Doraemon's ears were bitten off by a mouse.]
Huh? Not by a mouse?!
I said a cat did it!
Ah, yes!
Sorry.
I thought you were someone who could pull tools out of the pocket on his stomach.
[Note: Parody of Doraemon. His pocket is filled with tools.]
Well, it's not that I can't.
Huh? You can?
Of course. Who do you think I am?
I-In that case...
That thing that lets you fly through the sky!
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's Bamboo Copter.]
Or the door that lets you go anywhere!
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's Anywhere Door.]
Or the flashlight that makes stuff big or small!
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's Small Light.]
Scary!
I'm scared, Mommy!
This person scares me!
He'll fly through the sky to peek on women bathing.
Once he can go anywhere, he'll sneak into a girls' locker room.
He'll become small so he can slide down a girl's cleavage.
Ah! I'm scared!
This person's an animal!
A sex-craved beast! A sex beast!
Why can you only come up with criminal actions?!
Huh?
Isn't that all there is?
No!
I would use them to improve myself!
Well, if that's the case, I guess I'll bring them out.
Bamboo-wing!
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's Bamboo Copter]
Go-anywhere sliding door!
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's Anywhere Door.]
Big and small light!
[Note: Parody of Doraemon's Small Light.]
Uh.
This is it?
Such a weak response!
So you think these look weak?
You probably think they're just toys.
Well, kinda...
You'll be surprised when I use them.
Really?
Give it a try if you don't believe me.
How are you supposed to use this?
Just open it.
Like this?
Isn't this just a door with a piece of paper on the other side?!
Yeah, switch the paper and you can see anywhere you want.
Huh?!
And it's too small to go through!
Man, you just don't stop complaining.
You should learn to be satisfied with what you have.
How am I supposed to be satisfied by something a child could have made?!
What are you doing?!
This is probably just a flashlight.
W-Wait, hold on.
There's a reason for this.
Eh?
Please! Just listen to me!
Please!
You see, this is still a work-in-progress.
A prototype.
I'll bring a working one later so just use this for now.
Well, it carries out the function of lighting up dark places.
Right? Right?
Very useful! Super useful!
Just think about it.
It's the middle of the night and you're going to buy one of those
[Note: In Japan, racy magazines are often sold in vending machines.]
magazines you don't want other people to know about.
The flashlight helps you find the money you dropped so you can buy the magazine.
Could you stop treating me like I'm in middle school?!
I feel like an idiot for expecting anything.
What are you saying?!
Here! This is amazing!
It's the real thing!
You can fly if you stick this on your head!
Really?
Don't you mean that it can fly when it's not attached to anything else?
No way. It's the real deal.
You can actually fly.
I just have to put this on my head, right?
Yeah...
It's just...that...
Don't say I didn't warn you.
Hey.
Uh, don't you have one that goes vertically instead of horizontally?
Oh, that.
I actually brought one.
Bamboo-wing: Vertical!
Oh. You have one.
But I wouldn't recommend using it.
Ah, not again.
That old timer gave me another defective model.
So yeah...
This shows that you shouldn't rely on tools.
Isn't that great, big guy?
You've learned something.
So what exactly are you going to do to help me?
Big guy...
You can't rely on others.
If you rely on me and my tools from the start, your future won't change a lick..
You see, big guy...
I'm essentially supposed to be with you.
I might bring out a tool to help you every once in a while or listen to you complain.
But for the most part, I don't intend to do anything.
Got it?
Kids are no longer curious or adventurous
because of the dragon that brings dead people back to life if you collect seven balls
[Note: Refers to Dragon Ball.]
and the robot cat who pulls out tools when someone goes crying for help.
Uh?
Did you just deny your own existence?
I'm no cat.
And that's not the issue here.
People haven't realized this yet,
but the robot did more good when he was by the kid's side
than when he was using tools to solve his problems.
It wasn't a parent, sibling, or pet.
But it was someone the kid could talk to about anything, like a friend.
It was important to have someone who could accept all his flaws and weaknesses.
Do you have someone like that, big guy?
Right?
But you don't need to worry.
You and I are friends now.
Okay?
Yes.
So let's start by switching that TV to a digital one.
Oh, that.
Are they really going to switch on July 24, 2011?
Well, in the end...
What's wrong?
Not good.
We'll be overheard by Skynet.
[Note: Parody of Terminator]
Skynet?
Don't you mean the Time Patrol?
[Note: Refers to Time Patrol from Doraemon.]
You see...
Skynet is this computer developed by the military.
But at one point, it determined that humans were its enemy.
That was the beginning of a long war between robots and humans.
Uh, I don't see where this is going.
Didn't I explain this in the beginning?
I came from the future because people were worried about you.
I can use tools to protect you.
But that's all.
Uh, yeah...
I'm pretty sharp.
Lucky you, Connor!
[Note: Parody of Terminator]
Huh?
Connor?
Connor!
Connor?
Aren't you...Connor?
I'm Shinpachi Shimura.
Sorry, I got the wrong guy.
Huh? What...?
The next episode...
"If It Works Once, It'll Work Over And Over Again."
[A new type of flu has hit Edo.]
[Shinpachi keeps encountering bothersome individuals while caring for his sister.
[See you next time.]